Some Scriptures make me wrestle more than others...
This honesty make shock you, but I'm going to risk the shock to open my heart to you...
Sometimes, I'm disappointed. Sometimes, I feel like I've given and given and given and haven't received. Though I rarely use such stark or blatant words, it's a safe bet that my heart has felt and my mind has thought what my lips have not allowed my tongue to say: I deserve more from God than what I'm getting out of life.
Whew. Truth be told, I've felt that way lately.
Then, because I truly do want to "Let the word of Christ dwell in [me] richly..." (ref. Colossians 3:16), I stay in the Word. I do believe there's always something for me there, and I look for God and wait on Him. Well, He showed up and kicked my booty today, and I'm thankful for it. A good Dad disciplines a loved son.
Check this out; Jesus was teaching, and He said, "Will any one of you who has a servant plowing or keeping sheep say to him when he has come in from the field, 'Come at once and recline at table'? Will he not rather say to him, 'Prepare supper for me, and dress properly, and serve me while I eat and drink, and afterward you will eat and drink'? Does he thank the servant because he did what was commanded? So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.'" (Luke 17:7-10 ESV)
God owes me nothing. I am indeed an unworthy servant!
What have I been expecting?
Did I expect God to make sweet tea and bake crullers and send me a Day Spring "Thank You" note? i am the unworthy servant. HE IS THE MASTER!
God has given me MORE than I deserve...plus, plus, times plus multiplied by more plus something else. In Christ Jesus, I am infinitely rich. I've been put in my place, and I'm thankful. My stinkin' thinkin' was in the way of my rich joy.
That old, rotten, stinking, lying, thieving, destroying enemy creeps into my thinking from time to time and gets me to thinking like he did Adam and Eve. He makes me believe God owes me something or is holding out on something.
Well, hogwash. #hogwash Pound sign, hogwash. Number sign, hogwash. Just hogwash. God does not owe me a thing! The Father has given me the Son. Dwell on that with me...God has given me the Son for salvation and the Son sent the Spirit for sanctification. I'm a blessed man!
Wow, Luke 17 today...wow. Thank You, Lord, for loving me and chastising me for my own good. Thank You, Father, for your great grace and mercy. Thank you for continually giving me more than I deserve and thank You also for not giving me what I actually deserve.